|Something of the week|
The Flying, French Speaking Pots From Outer Space
This is a high school assignment I wrote for my English class. The student teacher brought in an old object that looks like a pot with a hinged lid, something like this:
Without telling us that it was, our assignment was to write a story of that it was. We were allowed to be as creative as we wanted. Here was what I gave in.
It must have been a dream. It must have. Nothing this strange can actually be true. I'm sweating profusely and I am dizzy, but I keep thinking back to the odd event. I am sitting at my desk all by myself, all the lights are off but my desk lamp. Could it have happened?
I recall a dark room like my office but seemed to be hundred times larger with darkness extending forever. I couldn't see at all but about a foot from my face. There were sounds coming from the darkness. A kind of clapping -- no, more like banging. It seemed to fill the room. Perhaps there were hundreds or even thousands of these metallic bangings all at different times and duration. It was driving me crazy.
All of a sudden there was a flash of light, like lightning and all became silent. In that fraction of a second I saw them. There were odd looking, metallic in composition, and small. They appeared to be small frying pans but with lids that were hinged to what appeared to be their handles.
A quick moment after the flash of light, there was a snap. In no time there was a barrage of these "frying pans" all around me, just floating back and forth from the darkness. Some getting very close to my face. I was stupefied. I thought I'd seen all the odd things on the whole planet. I then realize that I wasn't on Earth anymore.
When my head started to clear, I noticed that there was little to no gravity. I was strapped to what looked like a wooden beam, odd. The noise I heard earlier was slowly coming back. When I adjusted to the dim light, I found the source of the noise. The flying pots were opening and closing their lids in an unknown rhythm. They seemed to be communicating. Some of these pots were zooming toward me stopping in front of me and then went back to where they came from.
Then came another flash of light but this time I wrenched in pain and what seemed to be electricity flowing through my body. It seemed to last forever. As the pain was slowly going away I noticed that the pots had quieted again but have gotten into large groups, just like I used to do back when I played football for the Pat's. I suddenly had the feeling that I was in danger and I wanted to leave. I wrestled from the straps holding me on this post and I heard violent screams escaping from my throat.
To my surprise one pot came to me, stopped right in front of my face and said "Qu'est-ce que tu fais?" and returned back to the group I was shocked out of my body. I was probably in a space ship on my way to Pluto, I am surrounded by flying pots and they are speaking French to me. Oh God!
Hours seemed to pass and nothing new had happened other then an occasional French phrase spoken here and there. Luckily, I took a French course years ago and I understood what they were saying. I decided to test my luck. Something simple, something I could say: "Je m'appelle Michelle." All the pots, in unison turned around and "looked" at me. The next second I was unconscious. Another flash of light and the pain knocked me out.
I woke up on a soft object that bobbed up and down like a waterbed. I was comfortable. As I started to remember what happened, I immediately stood up and noticed that I wasn't tied down any more. I was in a small square room with very soft padding like those rooms in mental hospitals. I looked carefully at the walls and I couldn't find any opening at all. No entrance, window, or air vent.
I started to bang against the walls trying to find a door of some sort. In not finding anything, I decided to stop. I sat on the soft floor and leaned on the soft wall wondering what would happen next.
Hours have passed and nothing has happened. I have become impatient and very hungry. Suddenly a bang, similar to the pots. I turned around to see one of the pots pour a soupy, white liquid onto the floor. It then said "mangez!" (meaning to eat). The pot then floated to a wall and went through it like a ghost. I wasn't too surprised at this, being that I was abducted by French speaking Pots from outer space. I looked at the white mess on the floor and decided that there was no way I'd eat that. But I could really go for a large steak. As if magic the white liquid started to move and change color until it formed a T-bone steak with all the fix'ins including the A1. I found that I was really hungry because I went straight to the steak without thinking about the consequences.
After I ate the large tasty steak, I went to sleep. It seems that something was in the food. When I woke up I was back on Earth, at the office, not knowing what to do. I think that will go home and stop watching those scary rated R movies. But what a story this would make.
After submiting the reports she told us it was called a Slient Butler which is used for cleaning crumbs off tables.
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